Unlike most people, I actually like Mondays. It’s a fresh new week, and you know that the week has the possibility of being good. I passed my med terms, so this has already been a good day, and now I’m watching the guinea pigs play…lil cuties.
Today I find out for sure if Rich is staying on posting or coming home, and I’m nervous, but too tired to feel sick. If he isn’t coming home, I’ll at least get to see him at Easter, along with my mom. I think it’ll be nice, and I kind of wish we could still do the easter thing, minus Rich coming home, but I”ll take what I can get
Wrote a letter to my grandparents today. I love them a lot, and they’re always in the back of my head, but I know that they’d be disappointed if they knew I was bisexual. I’m not going to go there, because I’d feel bad for stressing them out if I told them, and I really don’t need the approval of anyone, so why ask? They’re awesome, and I don’t need anything more than that.
I’m still debating how to go about telling my mom about the bisexuality. She knows that I’ve played with other chicks, but doesn’t know that I identify as a bisexual, and she doesn’t realize just how much attraction I have for girls. I think it would honestly scare her, and aggravate her bipolarity, so I think I”ll leave it for now. I think I’ll give her a call today, just to talk.
March is almost over, which means barbecue/short-short season will be starting!………..once we get rid of the blanket of snow that showed up this morning. I’m going to ignore the snow, however, and pretend that it’s sunny and wonderful outside. I’d kill for rain though. I think I’ll try and make it a beach summer this year….yes….beach summer. I sincerely hope all the hot college/uni chicks stay here, otherwise it’ll be a white trash holiday cleanup. Sigh
you guys have no idea how much i want these pictures to be true:
i also wish i were drew barrymore, if this is true. come out come out wherever you guys are!
if it’s not true, then i’m glad there’s some high-profile homo-eroticism going on. and go see whip it if you haven’t! it’s one of the best movies of 2009! and definitely the funnest! that’s a lot of exclamation points for me.
College of the Sequoias professor and Meet in the Middle organizer Robin McGehee was arrested today in front of the White House, for participating in a “Don’t Ask Don’t Tell” protest rally. She was later released after paying a $35 fine. Also arrested were Lt. Dan Choi and Capt Jim Pietrangelo, after they handcuffed themselves to the fence in front of the Executive Mansion.
More pictures of Robin’s arrest and of Lt. Choi and Capt. Pietrangelo handcuffed to the White House’s fence after the jump. Read more at America Blog.
Pictures from MeetintheMiddle for Equality, Huffington Post and America Blog.
You know that “fact” that men supposedly think about sex once every-three-seconds; and you know how you think, that surely, cannot be possible! To have sex, women, and sex on the mind that often, surely cannot be healthy, or even natural…
Well, I think I’m suffering from it.
See, I get these bouts of what I call “Gay Days”. These are, in effect, days where I feel very, very gay. All I want to do is think, oogle, be around, watch, hear, women. I long to have another woman next to me, I long to have someone to hug, to touch, to be touched by; someone who is here. Normally, these days coincide with some-degree of sexual frustration, which for the past few months, has been a constant state for me.
This in effect means that I am going through a continuous “Gay Day”. These days are fine on a Saturday or Sunday; I can spend as much time as I want oogling over beautiful women on Tumblr or Flickr; I can watch as many films with my favourite actresses in as I want; I can even spend entire days in bed watching a whole season of The L Word. This time is free time, it’s my time, it’s time where I can literally do whatever I want.
During the week however, I’m still required to function. I’ve got my A Levels ahead of me, and yet all I can think of is the really nice arse of one of the teachers at my sixth-form.
Trying to write essays, or complete homework, in fact, any sort of required, or at least, much needed work, with the constant images of bums, boobs, and sexy eyes in my mind is completely and utterly hopeless. Worse, is that I spend some lessons just staring, looking at the perfect woman standing or sitting in front of me, and dreaming of all the possibilities. When the bell rings, suddenly I realise I’ve spent a whole hour learning absolutely nothing.
Being a good student, daughter, friend and well, human, in these situations is mind-numbingly difficult. To continuously have to counter-act any urge to shout at the top of my voice “Please, someone have sex with me” whilst walking around the corridors, or having to go through an essay with a particularly fanciable, sexy, beautiful, fabulous teacher that I am hopelessly in love with, whilst being about to see the top of her bra, and keeping a straight face, and answering and nodding appropriately, certainly is no easy task.
Next weekend I intend to ratify this excruciating problem. Now that more of my friends are of age, we can now embark upon more nights out; which almost certainly means in my group of gay friends, that we’re going to hit the gay clubs.
Even better is that a certain girl of interest is having a gathering at a pub at some time in the near future. Although I don’t properly know her, one or two of my friends do, which does mean the slight possibility of us attending. I’ve said before, I do live in hope, and I seriously hope that this might happen. Even not just for her, but because it surely must be better than yet another night in with a crap film.
In the mean-time however, I’m going to have to try my best. I’m going to have to find a way or something, to try to curb my thoughts; maybe I can try to just keep them unconscious through some weird self-hypnotic process… Or stab myself with a pin every time I inappropriately think about someone at a bad time. Conditioning worked for Pavlov’s dogs, surely it can work for me?
How on earth do men ever get anything accomplished with sex constantly on their mind? It’s truly a marvel!
Last week the ACLU sued a high school in Mississippi.
You see, it’s prom season, and a girl at Itawamba Agricultural High School announced she was going to go to the prom with her lesbian girlfriend wearing a tuxedo. The school let her know that the prom was for guy-girl couples and so, naturally, the girl and the ACLU filed a lawsuit against the school.
Naturally. That’s the next logical step to take in the process. Why bother talking to the school board or setting up a conference? There’s money (and headlines) to be made here.
So the school said, “OK, fine, this is more trouble than it’s worth. Prom is canceled, maybe a private organization will hold the prom instead. This is getting crazy.”
So now the ACLU is suing the school again, trying to force them to have the prom.
You’re having a prom? I’LL SUE YOU.
You canceled the prom? I’LL SUE YOU.
I can just see the ACLU in their Fortress of Spinning Wheels, shaking their gentle fist, “You won’t escape us! Bwwaaaaa ha ha ha ha ha ha! Have the prom, cancel the prom, we don’t care, we’re suing someone.“
I’m looking forward to next week, when the ACLU sues Mattel for not producing a Kendra doll, a female version of Ken, which, as we all know, stifles a girl’s opportunity to explore all of her options.
The week after that, the ACLU will sue McDonald’s for only serving Coke and discriminating against Pepsi. McDonald’s will then serve Pepsi and will in turn be sued by the ACLU once again. The ACLU will claim they are only “trying to reach their pointless lawsuit quota for March.”
The ACLU will then get its own half-hour sitcom on the WB, called “Them Wacky Bungholes.” They will also get a 1-hour reality series on FOX (airing after American Idol) in which two contestants are introduced to one another. The first person to sue the other person is hired by the ACLU. The following week, they will be fired.
They will then be sued by the ACLU.
Meanwhile, millions of ignored starving people die, child trafficking continues, and Lady Gaga continues to fool people into thinking she’s actually a female. But at least the ACLU got to sue a school because of their prom.
I never thought this day would come.
My family seemed so… accepting.
They acted as if everything was normal.
But no, apparently someone who is GENETICALLY programmed to love me no matter what actually judges me behind my back.
I can’t get any relief.
I finally went on 60 day at the theatre.
Strictly sears now.
Hopefully.
I wonder if they’ve called yet…
Most people, women at least, between the ages of 15 and 40 have at some point seen the show, Sex in the City, or the movie. As much as they are entertaining, they do include several truths. But then at end of the day there is nowhere in Scotland that is like Manhattan.
I live in a small town when i’m at University, for some people romance here is very much alive, but for others it seems that everything here happens in its own little bubble. When you meet somebody new here, it tends to be a drunken chat at a messy house party where you drunkenly pull and hope you find that the next day they add you on facebook through a friend of a friend of a friend. If not, then you put it down do a drunken mess that you hope you will never see.
Well in my town the chances of running into somebody you drunkenly hooked up with once is like a 1 in 7 chance, at least once a week! Problem is, this isn’t a shock to anybody and so the solution to the problem, you blank them.
Im a regular 19 year old, had my own fair share of boyfriends, hook ups and lesbian experiences. But it never ceases to amaze me the way people handle sex and love now adays.
I’ve been successfully avoiding Lady Gaga for years now and it’s worked out pretty great. I tend not to pay attention to pop stars until they reach their trainwreck stage. However, tonight, a shocking twist in the Gaga epic took place when my facebook newsfeed informed me that several formerly proclaimed die-hard fans were recounting their fandom on account of her leaked video featuring Beyonce. So, I decided to take a peak at what the fuck exactly is this “pop-culture art” trend I’ve been hearing so many people condescendingly circle jerk about all this time.
The comparison of Gaga to Britney and Madonna has seemed obvious to me. What I don’t understand is how people can mistake Gaga for a great thinker in terms of artist. Sure, she’s a legitimate artist–the same way Billy Ray Cyrus is a legitimate artist. Her music and image is a cultural commodity–she was signed to a sub-label of Universal not three years ago, and was launched into fame by Akon. Next thing you know, she’s playing a major stage Lollapalooza, and the rest is history. And, while I recognize some fans might not consider Gaga’s latest video to be her best, but I really don’t see how her music videos are much different from any of the other mainstream pop videos whose popularity essentially hinges on selling its female star as a sex object. Gaga definitely isn’t making art for art’s sake, and to perpetuate her impression that she is is sheer stupidity. Gaga is acting on the behalf of the major record labels that make money for her, and the “spectacle” is feeding a million-dollar industry.
I first heard about Gaga in my intro to gender studies class when my teacher read us an interview in which Gaga disowned feminism while simultaneously claiming to be fighting against sexist double-standards within the music industry:
G: You see, if I was a guy, and I was sitting her with a cigarette in my hand, grabbing my crotch and talking about how I make music ’cause I love fast cars and fucking girls, you’d call me a rock star. But when I do it in my music and in my videos, because I’m a female, because I make pop music, you’re judgmental, and you say that it is distracting. I’m just a rock star.
I: Are you also a feminist?
G: I’m not a feminist – I, I hail men, I love men. I celebrate American male culture, and beer, and bars and muscle cars…
Apparently Gaga likes to buy into the stereotype that feminism=manhatingism, and although she claims to be at least as ballsy as a shallow, groin-scratching male, she’s not man enough to stop spreading ignorance of the political opinions she claims to believe in. Throughout her career, Gaga has gone back and forth on where she stands with the ‘f’ word. What’s puzzled me this whole time is how Gaga, in addition to being the latest thin, blonde, half-naked super star, has come to be seen as a leader within the LGBTQ. In this same interview two years ago, she speaks revealingly as to her appeal to the gay community:
G: I’ve got three #1 records and I’ve sold almost 4 million albums world wide.
I: So what’s the biggest [thrill] of your career so far?
G: The gay community.
I: Why?
G: ‘Cause I love em so much. ‘Cause they don’t ask me questions like that. ‘Cause they love sexual strong women who speak their mind.
Gaga recognizes that her most loyal fans are members of the gay community, and in this strange political climate, apparently that means she has a right to claim she’s a leading voice within that political sector–even though the LGBTQ and feminists have worked together for decades.
You know who else the gay community loves? Britney Spears and Madonna. Britney Spears and Madonna even made out one time, you know, just for their gay fans, right? It seems to me Lady Gaga–who is an open bisexual–is no more a gay rights activist than either of the former Queens of Pop. Further, if she’s so gung-ho about supporting the gay community, why is she so apprehensive about being an open feminist? I guess I just don’t see how Lady Gaga has really changed anything in the mainstream music industry.
What is with closeted politicians being the dumbest kind of person? Last week it was Roy Ashburn, Republican State Senator from Bakersfield this week it’s Eric Massa, former Democratic congressman from New York. Who originally stated he was retiring due to health reasons but now it turns it was because of well.. I’ll let him tell it in his own words.
(warning watching Glenn Beck may be dangerous to your sanity)
more about “Former Rep. Eric Massa Tells Glenn Be…“, posted with vodpod
I generally think that coming out is a bad idea. Anytime you have to articulate your identity you are giving credence to the ideology of heteronormative behavior. When was the last time someone came out to you as straight?
Coming out presupposes a world of coerced conformity. A world where nuclear, heterosexual, two person, monogamous relationships are the prescribed norm. Coming out states that you acknowledge this and are stating your identity as something other than this. Making an apology. Telling people that you understand that everyone is presumed straight, until they say otherwise. This fosters an ideology of reinforced heteronormative behavior patterns. Expecting that people will love you, even though your queer, puts the burden of tolerance, and the power to represent the default identity, on straight people.
I never really thought much about coming out. I grew up in San Francisco. Everyone was queer, queer friendly, out and proud. There were more gay flags flying in my childhood than bigots screaming slurs, a lot more. I’m thinking about this a lot this week as last week I was chased out of a party being called gay. How is it possible that “gay” is an insult? I’m living in a very scary world where heterosexuality is presupposed, expected, and thought to be desirable. I’m living in a world where people use heterosexism as a weapon.
I have issues with coming out, with having to come out and with the problems that you cannot undo once you come out. I’m all about being yourself and not having to explain it to anyone. I’m gonna come out though. Not that you don’t know I’m queer. I’m sure I have said it before. I talk about my girlfriend and about how I prefer to be in non-traditional relationships with people of non-conforming gender identities.
I’m gonna come out as a parent. I have offspring. I almost never mention it to people who don’t need to know. I want to protect my children from the bizarre world of professional perversion I live in and love. I want to keep my worlds separate. I want to have a modicum of privacy. I want to have my cake and eat it too. If I never told you I have children don’t take it personally, you have to be very close to me to have been brought into my world. I don’t trust most people with this part of my life.
I’m in a position where I feel I must come out though. Being silent about my children on my blog and in my art is no longer advantageous. The man who knocked me up when I was a teenager is not giving me any choice. I must come out if I am going to write about the full spectrum of a major problem I am dealing with. If I am going to not censor my writing, I have to come out.
Alright, so now you know I’m a mother. You might be asking how this is relevant. I’m getting to it.
The father of my children, after our brief high school fling, became an evangelical Christian. Once he was into kinky sex and drugs. Now he is married in the suburbs slandering my queer intellectual identity. His wife is a stay at home bleached blond who has nothing but time on her hands. She is reading this blog.
The two of them have a real problem with the way I live my life. They want to throw stones and suggest that I’m not allowed to have more fun than they are. It has been a long time since I have been able to deal with the father of my children in a way that is indicative of adult communication. I’m tired of being called the antichrist. I’m tired of the threats and the hostility. I’m tired of them trying to keep my children from me because I’m a queer, kinky, sex working academic.
The shit has to stop now. I can’t really process things without writing about them. When the wife started posting hate mail to this blog I realized that I could not tell you what I was doing without these crazy Christians knowing too.
I sat stewing for a while. I was going to post my upcoming travel but I didn’t want to tell them what I was up to. I thought I would be covert about it, telling you that I’m having problems with the right wing and that I can only tell you vague details of my trip. I’m sick of trying to dance around their bullshit so I figured it might be easier to out myself as a mother than it would be to deal with them holding this over me, trying to harm my family, playing games. I’m sick of it.
I’m coming to New England to attend a conference, visit some family, and play. I’m bringing my teenage son who wants to look at colleges in the area. I’ll have a little bit of free time to play. Hopefully you want to play. I’m really in the mood to have some fun, get off this crazy coast, away from the Christians, out of the vapid self-loathing monotony of southern California.
I’ll have time to play March 13th – 16th in Western Mass. I might be heading to Cape Cod on the 13th and I will be in NYC for a day but I’m not sure which day. I’ll be in Cambridge with very limited availability March 19th – 21st.
I hope I get to beat you, piss on you, and write a dirty story to anger the crazy Christians. Help me have some fun, pay my increased tuition, and get out of the funk that is becoming the essence of my life. Come on, let’s live a little!
or you do know me but we haven’t talked in a while (since, like, high school; hi, facebook). or you know me and we talk all the time but you just want to hear me drop the jersey smacktalk and sound smart for once (heh), check out the interview i did for CBC/Radio-Canada (like NPR but only in canada) on “senior sexting” (yes, that means your grandparents (and parents!) are sexting now and no i’m not kidding and yes i actually wrote about it).
the interview was for their weekly tech/culture show, “Spark.” click here to listen. i’m on at about the 18 minute mark (sorry, no fast fwd, i know i know). also available for free download on itunes (just search “spark from cbc radio”; it’s episode 105, march 7-9–this week’s episode ).
That is the question that needs to be asked and answered before any serious debate can take place on this issue. Without answering this question, lifting the gay ban in the military will be opening the door to major unrest and frivolous complaints from gay and lesbian activists who may serve in the military.
The reason I say “frivolous” is because I saw quite a few complaints from feminists in the military that turned out to be bogus “gotchas.” The really sad part about this is that the truth didn’t come out until several careers had already been ruined.
Remember “Tailhook 91″ and the bogus charges that Paula Coughlin made in 1991? How many careers were ruined before the truth about what really happened and how Coughlin was a willing participant came out? How much damage was done before someone realized that Coughlin admitted to her fellow Tailhookers that they had made her “see God?” How long did it take before the public was made aware of the fact that Coughlin had fingered people who weren’t even at Tailhook?
Therein lies the problem. What happens if some gay or lesbian goes into the military and has a radical political agenda? How long before some false charge of “homophobia” is made and a fabricated scandal ensues which destroys one or more careers? What are the safeguards against this?
TAILHOOK 91 is a prime example of how one person making false accusations can have a major negative impact on the military and its combat effectiveness.
Lt. Col. Oliver North notes the following:
But the Lesbian-Gay-Bisexual-Transgendered community, which worked so hard to elect Mr. Obama, wasn’t feeling the love. The President wouldn’t let them out of the closet, they argued, and their patience was wearing thin. POTUS had to give them reason to stay in the fold.
The payoff came in his State of the Union Address, when Mr. Obama went off on another frolic and diversion in declaring, “This year, I will work with Congress and our military to finally repeal the law that denies gay Americans the right to serve the country they love because of who they are.”
No, it is because of how they act and how they are trying to force their agenda on America whether it be through secret classes (i.e. telling children not to inform their parents) to school children or by pulling a Coughlin on the U.S. Military.
More:
Army Chief of Staff, General George Casey informed the Senate Armed Services Committee he has “serious concerns” about repealing the law in the midst of war. “We just don’t know the impacts on readiness and military effectiveness,” Casey testified.
A somewhat softer note was sounded by Air Force Chief of Staff, General Norton A. Schwartz, who said, “This is not the time to perturb the force that is, at the moment, stretched by demands in Iraq and Afghanistan and elsewhere without careful deliberation.”
Admiral Gary Roughead, Chief of Naval Operations, testified that he endorsed a “study” of the issue because “only with that information can we discuss the force that we have, not someone else’s.” He also resisted a “freeze” on discharges for homosexual behavior, citing duty to “the families that support the force.”
The straightest shooting of all was done by General James Conway, the Commandant of the Marine Corps. In testimony to the House Armed Services Committee on February 24, he said, “Unless we can strip away the emotion, the agenda, and the politics…and ask…do we somehow enhance the war fighting capabilities of the United States Marine Corps by allowing homosexuals to openly serve, then we haven’t addressed it from the correct perspective.” Then he reloaded.
After observing that proponents of repeal have failed to produce any evidence that openly homosexual individuals serving in uniform will improve combat readiness, Conway unequivocally stated: “At this point…my best military advice to this committee, to the Secretary, and to the President would be to keep the law such as it is.”
Just going forward on someone’s political whim is not the way to do it. It is true that gays are allowed to serve in militaries like Great Britain and Isreal, but it is also true that in both cases, gays are counseled to keep it low profile.
Are U.S. gays and lesbians willing to do the same thing? Given the militancy of the gay and lesbian political movement, my first inclination is to answer “no.” Anyone who has been forced to take a required “diversity” class from an employer knows why.
You can access the complete article on-line here:
Not So Fast
Lt. Col. Oliver North
Human Events
March 5, 2010
This is something my partner and I ask each other on a daily basis. We’re pretty quiet people for the most part, and once in awhile, we’re able to share moments where we simply stare at each other and feel comfortable enough to sit silently. After an extended period of time, after one of us realizes that we haven’t spoken in some time, we ask one another, ” what are you thinking?” It happened this morning when we woke up. Every morning, we slowly rouse to the sound of seven snoozes. After the fourth or fifth round of beeping, we’re both fairly awake and snuggling into each other, delaying our inevitable departure from our night’s sleep and our lover’s arms. Today, horrible thoughts came into my mind as we lay close, my head on her shoulder, her arm abound by back.
About two months ago, we went out to dinner in our town, about a mile down the road from our apartment. It was a frigid New England night, it had snowed the previous week and we were in a deep freeze, complete with below zero wind chill. I decided to pull my leather jacket out of the furthest reaches of our closet in an attempt to cut down on wind to bone penetration. On our way out of dinner, we hurriedly walked up the block to our car. Normally, we would be hand in hand, walking leisurely and talking softly. Tonight, Allison carried the doggy bag and my hands were in my pockets for frostbite prevention. Then, there was a moment. A tall, older man walked by us, on Allison’s side. She was telling me a story from her day at work, and between intently listening to her and blocking out other sounds, I heard these words spewed out of the man’s mouth- “Nice girls… dress like… nice boys.” He had just passed me when I realized he was making a comment towards us. I stopped in my tracks, turned my head, and said “what the fuck?” The man continued to get into a parked car, a black Mercedes Benz nonetheless, and I thought it was over. In an attempt to try and calm me down, Allison pulled my hand out of my pocket and asked me what he said. The black benz then pulled up beside us, horn ablaze, and the man waving at us until I lunged forward and he peeled off.
I was thinking about what I should have done that night to teach this guy a lesson. All of my thought out scenarios end in violence, which is frightening. I am a staunch pacifist. I don’t believe in fists, or keying cars, or kneeing balls, or breaking teeth. But these are the things I wish I did to this tiny, insignificant prick. That night, I was furious. I felt I was the victim of a gay bashing and I thought I should report it to the police. I came up with any and all similes and metaphors comparing his need for a Mercedes to the size of his penis. And, of course, his inherent jealousy of seeing two women in love with each other instead of in love with his dick. All of this ending with, “I’m sorry your wife won’t fuck ya, buddy, there’s male enhancement drugs that can help ya in that department.”
Even thought this was months ago, I still wonder, “what the fuck were you thinking, guy?” And, what the fuck was I thinking? Why didn’t I react with more aggression? I guess it’s just not something I’ve ever felt I had to plan for. I’ve lived in Massachusetts all my life. I don’t know what it’s like to be beaten up or constantly threatened for loving my girlfriend. I’m not used to it. I can’t figure out if this is a good thing or a bad thing. I still wish I could find that bastard and do something awful to him, because I’m sure this 90 second moment doesn’t come to his mind with any kind of regularity. But, I suppose it keeps me grounded in the fact that there’s so much more to be done. My experience is nothing in comparison to what other women and men go through in other parts of the country to just protect their love. It’s easy to just sit back and say fuck you to these ignorant assholes. I wish I could do more than that for my community.
Sigh, Mondays.
College of the Sequoias professor and Meet in the Middle organizer Robin McGehee was arrested today in front of the White House, for participating in a “Don’t Ask Don’t Tell” protest rally. She was later released after paying a $35 fine. Also arrested were Lt. Dan Choi and Capt Jim Pietrangelo, after they handcuffed themselves to the fence in front of the Executive Mansion.
